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my lunch. in photos. and stuff like that.

Monday, November 03, 2008

special post for Telus.

Dear Telus,

This morning I noticed that my ASDL modem was not working anymore. That's too bad. I imagine a replacement should be easy to get, no?

Here's the breakdown of the next hour of my day:

-call telus hotline.
-speak to a robot, repeating myself because the robot doesn't understand me.
-eventually I get through to Technical Support. I'm told there's a 16 minute wait. I can opt to have them call me back when an operator is available.
-I opt to have them call me back.
-my phone rings. hello? "you are next in line for a representative.. click.. ehn ehn ehn ehn ehn ehn..." it hung up.
-call back
-talk to the robot again... at least I can predict what she wants to know now... so it's a little faster.
-this time it's a 20 minute wait for customer support. I already did my waiting! I'm not doing it again.
-I hang up. got a plan.
-call back.. rip through the robot answers.
-this time I go through "repairs" then I choose "home" (sounds right enough, right? it's my home.. it needs repairs).
-I explain my problem.. still mostly keeping my cool.
-I'm told that this dude can't help me, and he'll put me through to someone who can replace my modem...
-I'm put on hold. before I can even reply to that guy.
09:58 - listen to bon jovi on hold
10:02 - listen to abba on hold
-dammit! I think he has put me back in the line for the ever-popular "technical support" (did you try turning it off and on?")
-I hang up again.
-I have now resigned myself to missing my "scrum meeting"... but I know I need to do this, so they can fix my internets.
-I call again. rocket through the robot... go back to repairs
-now it doesn't even say how long the wait is.
-I get a person. they tell me this is phone repairs only... they'll put me through to ...
"WAIIIT!!!!" says I. "can you put me through to an actual person? I've just wasted an hour of my morning trying to get this sorted. do not put me back into the general queue!"... "ok" says he.
-I reach technical support.
-I explain my situation in detail. how the modem no longer displays ANY lights, and how I tried different outlets in my house, all the same result. still (barely) keeping my cool.
-"Sir, can you tell me what you have done to try to fix the problem?"
-"EEEEEEEEEAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGH!!!!" (cool lost... commence swearing).
-I reexplain my problem, and the hour I just spent trying to contact someone.
-She understands my frustration and will put me on hold whilst sorting out the modem-availability details.
-"hello sir, I have ordered you a new modem, it will be there 4-7 business days from now"
-"WHAT?! 4-7 days?!?! no internet? why am I paying you $80/month?!?!"
-"sir, it's being sent by 'snail mail', we will update your bill with the missing days of internet"
-yes... she actually said 'snail mail'. that's how much telus cares about their customers... to tell them that the problem will be fixed when a SNAIL gets there!
-me: all coool lost. gone. instead of swearing at representative, I put the phone down. not hanging up. go brush my teeth.
-I pick up the phone again, and say in my best robot-computer voice "are you still there?" "yes" she says!!! so I drop the phone again and go get ready for work.
-I pick up the phone again as I'm leaving for work... she was still talking. I hang up and leave.
later, after work...
-I call Shaw. I a put on hold, but no annoying computer questions.
-a human (of the female type) answers. I explain how I'd like phone and internet, I talk about a package I saw for about $65/month.
-she suggests a lesser phone package, with options that appeal to my needs more. now it's only about $55/month. wow. downselling. I like it!
-I have an appointment made to get my new internet installed on Thursday. that's 3 days from now... NOT 4-7. my bill will be about $10/month cheaper, long distance will be cheaper, and my download rate will go from a 179k/s max to 5M/s max.
good bye, telus. you suck.
(but maybe I'll be back someday when shaw makes me this angry).

(if you read all that, nice work. personally, I woulda stopped reading after 2 minutes. anyway... this all means my lunch posts may be a bit sporadic over the next week. deal with it. my blog, no rules). :)

an ex-telus customer.



Blogger Phil said...

I deserve something for reading all that. Angry asian man salutes you!

November 03, 2008 8:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Welcome to Shaw, comrade!
The digital phone/internet/TV package has served me well for many moons now.

November 04, 2008 10:47 AM  
Blogger gwilli said...

one addendum I have for this post...

this morning I learned how to get Telus service on the phone much quicker. when the robot asks to tell you 'in your own words' what you are calling about, just say "I want to cancel my internet". bam! service! I was offered the same internet I had at 1/2 the price, and my phone for about 1/2 price, too. amazing. you have to threaten telus with leaving if you want a deal. try it. I promise it'll work for you. as for me... I ended up spending another 15 minutes telling someone to cancel my internet while they kept trying to sell me more internet. for cheaper.

who are you mike spike?

November 04, 2008 10:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am not looking forward to trying to sign up for Telus again at the office, due to the fact that Shaw is for some reason incompatible with my VOIP phone here.

Mike Spike

November 04, 2008 11:38 AM  

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